Numbers Every Fabulous Woman Should Have on Her Speed Dial

1. A Good Hairstylist
2. A great make-up artist.
3. A good dermatologist.
4. Your favorite salesgirl.
5. Your favorite shoe store.
6. A good caterer.
7. A great baker.
8. A good photographer.
9. A party buddy.
10. Your physician. In case God forbid, you break your ankle in those 5 inch heels!

Jennifer Hudson Loses Mom, Brother, and Nephew

I respectfully ask that everyone keep Jennifer in their prayers. This is indeed a tragedy that no one should have to face.

Purple Reign: The Color of the Season!

Purple Reign by prettyo73

Clockwise: Oliver Bonas coat, J.Crew Dress $180, Bebe Strapless dress $139, D&G Silk Strappy Petal Dress $295, Top, Trendy Plus Size Clothing, $29.99, belleavenue.com, Joelle dress by Malene Birger $295, my-wardrobe.com, evening dress $36.00 GBP, 3.1 Phillip Lim looped belted dress $625, Net-a-Porter.com, Mint Jodi Arnold angel sleeved dress $495, Net-a-Porter.com.

Dresses are In!!

10 Ways to Step Your Wardrobe Game Up!

Feeling like you are less than fabulous? It's time for an intervention. Don't worry, nobody's gonna beat your door down or push a camera in your face while they make embarrassing comments about you. You can intervene on your own behalf and upgrade your look with the following tips!

1. Read all the fashion magazines and start a "look book". A look book features tear sheets from your favorite magazines with looks that you would like to wear or recreate. My magazine recommendations: Harpers Bazaar, InStyle, People StyleWatch, Lucky, Elle, Essence, and Vogue.

2. Stop buying articles that don't make sense. When you choose random items instead of items that go with what you already have, you are wasting money. Use the items in your wardrobe that are already fabulous, and coordinate them with other items you find. Unless you've lost weight, it's highly unlikely that you will need an entirely new wardrobe.

3. Accessorize properly. Bold jewelry is in now. Statement necklaces and bangles can be used to accent any outfit. Mix and match them with different outfits. A huge cocktail ring on one hand is very chic. For great jewelry check out Kenneth Jay Lane, Aldo Accessories, Forever Love, and Vivre.com

4. Bag it! A great handbag is essential for day-to-day wear, but it can also make or break an outfit. if you can't afford the designer ones, you an find similar bags (not knock-offs) in less expensive versions in department stores and online. Baghaus.com has great bags that are similar to designer ones.

5. Be prepared to take a look from day to night with a simple change. I try to dress for the just-in-case situations on a daily basis. Meaning, what I wear to work, should be able to take me to a party or dinner at night. Sometimes I even keep extra shoes or shirts in my car! Keeping that in mind, figure out what you can tuck inside your trunk!

6. Know your sizes, but know all designers are not the same. While I'm a 2 in Bebe, I'm a 6 in Nicole Miller dresses, go figure. If you're unsure about whether or not an outfit will fit, try it on for size!

7. Never be afraid to experiment with different looks. While traditionally I'm minimalist, I also love glamorous looks and I'll even slide in a twinge of Boho. Fashion has no rules, but DON'T go overboard!

8. Get a great cut. This not applies to clothes but to hair as well. Find a hairstyle that complements you but doesn't define you. In other words, you should be your hair not the other way around. Own your look and work it.

10 Reasons Why You Should Dress Better

1. Because you'll intimidate people, and that can work to your advantage.
2. You'll make people think you're rich even if you're not.
3. People will envy you.
4. People will want to be like you.
5. People will compliment you until you get sick of hearing them.
6. People will want to know where you got your outfit from.
7. You make them want to step their 'drobe game up.

8. When you look good, you feel good.
9. It keeps the losers at bay. Certain types of people will not approach you if they think you're out of their league.
10. Looks can kill.

How to Select & Wear a Fragance

1. Follow Your Nose. I never buy a fragrance based on who it's made by or who endorses it. I let my nose to the talking. While I've been partial to Ralph Lauren fragrances for the last 10 years (Romance, Glamorous, Polo Sport for Women), it's maybe because his scents are light and fresh. But I also love Stella McCartney's signature perfume as well as Calvin Klein's Eternity, Obession Night, Eternity Moment, and Euphoria. And I'm not opposed to classic's like Estee Lauder's Beautiful and my Chanel Chance. I buy what I like pure and simple. And while some people just go with whatever is hot at the moment, my choices are based solely on whatever I'm feeling at the moment.

2. Know what works for you. If you wear a scent and people turn their nose up when you walk by, perhaps that fragrance doesn't mix with your body's chemistry. Select another. I had to stop wearing one of my favorite scents because someone I worked for couldn't bear it. She was allergic, and got sniffly every time I entered the room. Well, I'm since been far removed from her sensitive nose and continue to wear my Burberry London with pride. That said, fragrances smell different on different people. What may be good for the goose...well you know the rest.

3. Go easy. Never douse yourself with perfume. That's what pleasure points (tee-hee) are for. In other words, put the scent where you may want to be kissed. Behind the ears, the wrists, the neck, and behind the knees are the best places to put a fragrance. As you wear it the scent will rise, so spraying it on the knees is actually quite effective. You want to enchant, not overload. And if someone can smell your perfume when you're clearly out of sight, you've put on too much.

4. Have a signature scent, but keep a stable of fragrances. I can't count how many fragrances I have, guessing wildly, maybe 30 or more. I like to change it up a bit. some fragrances are better suited for evening, others for daytime. Having an arsenal of fragrances can prepare you for anything. After all, no two days are ever the same.

How to Live Rich

Just because you aren't a millionaire, doesn't mean you can't live like one. The rich are rich because they know how to make money, keep money, and use their credit. Investing in yourself first is they key to living a life of luxury.

Save your money. If you're working, try and save 10% of your income from every paycheck. The current economy is in chaos but if you can't save 10%, shoot for five. Put it in a savings account or a high-yield money market account that you don't have access to.

Buy designer at a discount. Thanks to Bluefly, Eluxury, and Overstock, designer clothes don't have to come with a designer price tag. With savings of up to 70% off or more, wearing designer clothes won't break the bank. Invest in key pieces for your wardrobe, such as a fabulous cashmere coat, a structured black suit, or a pair of killer designer heels for a fraction of the cost.

Decorate like a designer. Interior designers find things for your home and mark them up as much as 30%. Cutting out the middleman by scouring local furniture stores, online sales, outlets, and flea markets will help your turn your house into a home. Great stores like West Elm, Crate and Barrel, Pottery Barn, and Ikea have reasonably priced statement pieces you can make your own with the right accessories.

Avoid falling victim to the new electronics. Electronic gadgets drop in price every three months, wait until then before you make a purchase. Every other week there's a new cell phone and I'll be damned if I don't want the next best thing. But for now, I'll just stick to my pink Palm Centro thank you very much.

Don't lease your car unless you plan to get rid of it within two or three years. Cars usually lose 30% of their retail value during the first year. Buying the car outright will save you a ton of money.

Pay bills on time. Paying your bills on time will increase your credit rating, pure and simple. Paying bills like rent/mortgage, utilities, and car payments should take priority over everything else.

Schoomze with high-society. Volunteer for an organization that donates to charity. You can usually attend their galas for free and you never know who you might meet. A lot of up and comers make connections this way.

Give freely. Good karma will come back to you. Sometimes the smallest dose of generosity can enable you to reap huge benefits.

Lastly, never apologize for wanting to be rich or successful. Ambition is sexy, poverty is for the lazy folks. Go after your dreams full speed ahead.

Make Your Own Luck

Too many times we complain about things not happening for us. We what we want, but we don't want to do what it takes to get it. If you want riches, luxury, a new job, a new love? What are you doing to get it. Things don't just all into your lap, you have to be proactive. Learn to use your connections and resources, in other words those famous six degrees of separation.

If you have a friend who may have a connection to something you want, ask for their help and offer them something in return. Offer to scratch their back, if they are a true friend, they will scratch yours. True friends are honest, respectful, and loyal. If your friends don't have the characteristics, they are not your friends. Don't make excuses for people who do not treat you with the same love and respect you give them. Friends help friends!

Tired of being stuck in dead-end job? Revamp your resume. To do this simply make a list of the things you've learned since the last time you used your resume to get a job and improvise. Sometimes we acquire skills we didn't even know we had and before long, we're using them so often, it becomes routine. That's a skill! Add it to your skill-set. Have you learned a new software just by playing around with it, well you have knowledge of it and it can go on your resume. Most jobs train you anyway, so there's nothing wrong with creative embellishment.

Are you dateless? Get off the couch!! You are not going to meet someone by sitting in the house. Frequent local hotspots like Starbucks, the gym, or book store to meet people. Get out as much as possible but it doesn't have to be to a club. You can meet people for free by simply walking inside a building. I've found that the local grocery store is a hot spot sometimes for attractive people. Be friendly and open-minded. Strike up a conversation. It won't kill you, I promise.

Get over your fears. If you're shy or anti-social, try and relax a bit before you talk to people. Some people may be just as shy as you. But someone has to break the ice. Find a common bond and take it from there.

There's a lot of ways to get what you want, it's all about how you get it. Positive attitudes make positive things happen. Your attitude determines your altitude and your attitude is everything for success!

5 Types of Men to Avoid!

The Liar a.k.a The Con Man: His approach is smoother than silk but he is no good for you. He will appear to be everything you need but in reality he is the man you need to stay away from. Con Men are hard to spot because they are too good to be true sometimes. They are skilled at wooing, but many of them are broke and on the come up. They want nothing more than money from you. This man has serious psychological and trust issues which is why he goes from woman to woman.

The Serial Baby Daddy: One kid is fine, two is grand, but three, four or five kids and he's never been married? This man is a climax away from trouble. It's clear he's somewhat careless and sure it's honorable if he's taking care of his children, however, one should head the warning signs.

Mr. Selfish: Everything is all about him. He wants what he wants when he wants it. There's never room for negotiation. He's always trying to get you to change your plans, your mind, your tastes--you get the picture.

The Mama's Boy: No one is ever gonna compare to his mama. He runs to her for everything, he takes her advice, goes by for home-cooked meals, can't make a move without her. Trouble is, you can't get a word in. If you want to make it work, you'll have to wean him off mama's boobs, but then, who wants to be with someone they have to wean?


The Tyrant: Mood swings, bad attitudes, outbursts, and arguments, this man knows no limits. What's scarier than he behavior is his ability to go from Dr. Jekyll to Mr. Hyde in 30 seconds flat.

How to Save on Designer Clothes

Just because you aren't a millionaire doesn't mean you can't look like a million bucks. Smart women know that the key to looking fabulous isn't about how much money you spend; it's all about how you spend it. From childhood I mastered the ins and outs of savvy shopping thanks to my mother and grandmother. Both women inconspicuously guided me in the ways and means of bargain hunting for the glamor gal. Armed with those skills and my wallet in tow, I have managed to come up on some fabulous designer deals and non-fabulous prices. Here's a few tips to help you do the same:

Shop Sales. Of course this is obvious, but there is an art to shopping sales. A sale is a sale is a sale, but being in the loop at your favorite store or boutique can give you a heads up on upcoming sales and discount opportunities.

Read the fashion magazines. Elle, Vogue, Lucky, InStyle, Marie Claire and People StyleWatch. Nearly all these magazines advertise special events or special discount opportunities, many of them online. Lucy Magazine usually features monthly discounts in each issue for readers with select retailers. I highly recommend getting a subscription to the magazine. Magazines also come in handy for knowing what's hot and what's not. I have binders with tear sheets from my favorite magazines for putting together looks. It's fun and a great way to plan your wardrobe. Other fun magazines to check out, the celebrity tabloids: Us Weekly, Life & Style, and OK.

Get on the list. Many local boutiques offer customer discounts and have mailing lists for their sales. Getting to know the store staff at your favorite boutiques puts you in the know. You'll also be invited to events that the stores may host.

Get the Card. If you don't mind paying the monthly bill, apply for a credit card at your favorite store. Bloomingdale's, Saks, Macy's and Neiman's all have great designer clothes. They also have rewards and huge discounts for cardholders.

Befriend a stylist. Having friends in high places can work to your advantage. I have a friend who is a stylist and connections for getting great clothes. If you know someone like this, tell them you want the hook-up!

Visit the discount retailers. Stores like Loehmanns, Off Fifth (Saks Fifth Avenue's Outlet), and Last Call (Neiman Marcus' Outlet) have great stuff at huge discount prices. I love Off Fifth, you can find great brands like Louboutin, Prada, and Versace here, and the shoes department is fabulous. Loehmanns features very high end brand name clothing for up to 70% off.

Know when a deal is a deal. If you're in a store and you find a designer item that retails for $1500 but it's $500 in the store, yes, that's a deal. Buy it, own it, love it. Some things are just too good to pass up!

Shop Online. Online shopping is one of the best ways to get designer deals. With websites. Some of the best sites like Eluxury and Bluefly can save you up to 80% off. Other great sites: www.HauteLook.com, www.DesignerApparel.com, and www.Shopbop.com, and www.Ideeli.com.

Join the Club. I joined Top Button.com a few years ago and since have been invited to several private sales, sample sales, and events. My club Shopgirls also consisted of buyers and fashionistas who networked. We had a variety of activities centered around shopping.

Don't feel like you have to miss out on designer clothes because you don't have the budget. Follow these tips and you can and will be fabulous!

If You Want to Find the One, Leave the Zeros Alone

Ah...love and marriage. Most of girls want it. To be head over heels in love with Mr. Right is a dream come true. So why do waste our time with men we know aren't right for us? Is it just to say you have someone? Because we have LSE (low self-esteem) or is it just to past the time? Too many times we ignore our sixth sense because we fear being alone or not having a date for the company Christmas party. But why bother checking for the zeros when we know they have nothing to offer? Some zeros come disguised as ones. They woo us, do us, then disappear without a trace. And the worst kind is the almost-husband, the one who goes a long for as long as he can and then when he realizes that marriage is the next step, he bolts. It could be fear, it could be because he's a jerk, or it could be because you are not the one for him. We have to be savvier when it comes to men. There is nothing wrong with dating like one either, meaning, don't put all your shrimp in one basket. Enjoy the buffet and try a little bit of everything.

It is a fact that it is easier for a man to get married than it is for a woman, particularly in the late 20s and the 30s. Why? Because there are less men to marry and more women who want to get married. A man can fall off the turnip truck, say he wants to settle down, and bam, a month later he's engaged or married. Meanwhile, one single woman is off the market, and 20 more come to replace her.

Be sure you are your best you that you can be. Like attracts alike. If you want a husband, act like a wife. Know how to cook, clean, and heat it up in rooms other than the kitchen. It is a fact that men require sex as a part of their livelihood, and there is nothing wrong with that. Don't use sex as weapon either. Holding out on sex with a man you love is silly and immature. Don't nag him, complain that he doesn't make enough money, or criticize his bad habits. You can make suggestions, however, don't turn something small into something big for no reason. Keep yourself up after you've landed your catch. Don't start falling off in your appearance because let me tell you that is the quickest way to turn a man off. In other words, don't get too comfortable. And he should respond in kind, making sure he's on point at all times. Lastly, always be supportive, even if you think his idea or goal is silly. If he makes it or breaks it, at least he can say, my woman was there through it all.

How do you know if a man is the one? When he's the one, it's right. They'll be little drama if there is any at all. You won't have to go out of your way to be with him because he will want to be with you. He will not ask you to take care of him. He will not ask you to do anything that he would not do for you. He will be a gentleman. He will hold your hand and offer his shoulder when you need it. He will not criticize you. He will offer his advice and his help if you need it. He will call you just to hear your voice. He will give you flowers just because. He will be proud to show you off to his family and friends. He will defend you and be down like four flat tires. He will marry you and you will work it out no matter what.

Don't be fooled by the zeros pretending to be heroes. They are smooth in their approach, but like a knock-off handbag, their flaws will always shine through.

(Photo by Robert Glenn)

How to Throw a Fabulous Party

Playing hostess to at your own soiree can be thrilling. Whether it's a celebration or simply just an opportunity to have a good time, careful planning can help you pull of an envy worthy bash that will be on everyone's minds for years to come. When I hosted my fabulous Superbowl party several years ago, the vibe was so good no one wanted to go home! Here's a few tips to make your next bash a success:


1. Select a Theme. Do you want a summer social, a backyard country fete, a glitz and glamorous cocktail party, or sexy salsa themed bash? Having a theme can help you with selecting music, food, and drinks. Make your theme fun and exciting or center it around an event like the Oscars, or a movie premiere. For decor, unless it's a huge theme party, keep it simple. A few accent lights or candles can set a mood better than any old balloon can.

2. Invite 50 of the most fabulous people you know. Guests are the key to your party success. The right mix of people can turn a room into an event, so be sure to mix it up. A great party is like a salad, just plain lettuce is boring, throw in some cucumbers, tomatoes, and cheese, and you've got a meal! Call or email your guests if your party is impromptu. Word of mouth is the best PR no money can buy!

3. Create Your Playlist. Thank God for I-pods. Thanks to the folks at Apple, we can now create playlists that go on forever for just about any event. Whether your playlist is soul, pop, rock, Latin, or R&B, keep the music light, upbeat, and continuous. Music always sets the mood.

4. Choose a signature drink. If you want to be extra special, create a concoction of your favorite liquor for your guests. Name if after you, name it after your mood, just be creative and keep the drinks flowing. If you plan to serve mixed drinks, be sure your bar is well-stocked, and well watched.

5. Keep the food light. It's a party after all, not a dinner (unless it is a dinner party), so give your guests something to nibble on but don't weigh them down with food. Choose light hors'deouvres and finger food that be consumed quickly.

6. Give yourself some space and keep it clean. Be sure your home has ample moving room. You want guests to be able to maneuver without bumping into something (bumping into someone is ok). Move any awkward furniture to allow guests to get to the bar and food areas. Place valuable houseware items in a locked bedroom to keep them from getting broken. Be sure your rest room is clean and has plenty of toilet paper and guest towels.

7. Know when to call it a night. Sometimes parties can last until the wee hours of the morning but if you would actually like to make it to bed, set a time for when your bash will end. Give guests a parting gift such as a gift bad or memento, and thank them for coming. Otherwise you may find some guests will never leave!

8. Enjoy yourself. It's a party after all. If you need help, ask your friends and family to play co-host. Be sure they know where everything is and keep them informed about what's going on. Establishing the rules beforehand will prevent problems. But don't forget to have a good time!

Planning a party isn't rocket science. It's all about the people, the drinks, the music, and the memories.

Men Don't Marry Hoochies!

I was talking to a friend of mine about marriage and relationships. He expressed his frustration about how delusional some females are when it comes to men. He on all accounts has had more than his fare share of women and is seeing a young lady who is on her way to becoming a physician. She is probably one of the only women he has dated that I actually like.

At any rate, he said, "Buffy the Body will never get married. She looks like sex." And went on to say that while men will entertain the ghetto divas and even sleep with them, when it comes to settling down, they are far from marriage material. Look at Luke, the biggest player of them all, Mr. Pop That Coochie himself married a cool, calm, collected lawyer named Kristin Thompson. Kristin is not some big booty, weave wearing, coochie poppin' chick from the hood, she's an intelligent, educated woman who looks more like a soccer mom than the wife of Mr. Doo Doo Brown.

Women need to understand, yes, you can get a man with your body, but you heart and mind will keep him. No man wants to be thought of as an "opportunity", and a lot of younger women in particular have that misconception. They think that being loud, sexy, and vulgar will get the man. Yeah, it'll get a man, but it may not be the kind you want. Men are visual, so indeed they are going to look at your behind if it's big, your breasts if they're sticking out, and anything else you want to display. But the infatuation with your looks isn't going to last long (unless the man is insecure or shallow) and eventually he'll get bored with you.

Men love to be stimulated mentally and physically. A women who is smart and sexy gives them a rush like no other. Even if they complain (like they do), most would rather have a good argument and make love to you afterward. Men want to know how we feel and what we think, it's all in the approach. And of course men want to feel needed. It lets them know we actually care about them. (LOL) As if all we do isn't enough already.

Being a simple bish is not cute. Drinking, smoking, and being loud will not get you anywhere. Beauty, brains, and subtle sexiness will. Having an opinion matters. And while you may not need to know how to cook, you should offer some food for thought.

Tyler Perry Makes History; But Doesn't Want to Pay "Payne" Writers

Tyler, Tyler, Tyler, you are about to make me ban you. On one hand you are making exceptional progress in the world of entertainment by being the first African-American ever to open your own film and television studio this weekend, and on the other you fire the writers from your #1 cable show who got you there in the first place. Excuse me while I have a Madea moment, but Tyler WTF is wrong with you?? Do you know that writers live to be in the WGA, get paid residuals and receive benefits for all their hard work?

Without writers there is no Hollywood. We make it happen. We put the words on paper for you to use to direct, produce, and make your millions of dollars. And Tyler, have you forgotten you ARE a writer, or have you gotten so big-headed that your have forgotten that fact.

I am unimpressed with you at this moment and if you don't make this "write" I will never spend another dime on a Tyler Perry flick again. I already don't watch the House of Payne, so don't give me another reason to not support you. You are turning a lot of people off with this behavior. Wrong is wrong no matter how you slice it.

My New Dinner-Date Night Outfit

Dress by Elizabeth & James $365

L.A.M.B Fen Pump - $395

When it Comes to Luxury, Do You Get What You Pay For?

Cheap shoes? I think not. You won't catch this debutante in Payless Shoes, sorry guys no offense, but your cheap shoes do not go well with my feet. I'm partial to certain brands, Nine West, Aldo, Louboutin, Enzo, Tahari, BCBG, and Lamb, I could go on, but you get the picture. Cheap shoes ALWAYS look cheap. No matter how you try to dress them "up" or down in most cases, they just don't look expensive enough. Cheap shoes can kill an outfit, just like a bad haircut.

Creme de la Mer costs $130.00 for 1 oz. My St. Ives Collagen Elastin Moisturizer, which I have been using since junior high, costs about $6. A manicure and pedicure may cost $30 at your local corner nail salon, at Bellacures, La Vie L'Orange or the Paint Shop in Beverly Hills, a mani-pedi may run you $50 and up. But those nail spas mentioned also have great environments, cushy chairs, personal foot bowls (not the noisy automated ones), and tea or coffee. You pay for the luxurious environment.

With hair products you may find it's easier to go down to your local Walgreens and buy some shampoo, but sometimes investing in the more pricey brands, can be beneficial to your hair. I'm a fan of Oscar Blandi, Mizani, Nioxin, and a few other brands that cannot be bought at your corner drug store.

I am partial to OPI and Essie nail polish? Why? Because when I used to buy other brands from grocery stores and drugstores, they didn't last as long. After a visit to Jin Soon Hand and Foot Spa in New York, I became partial to Essie. I had a manicure there and the manicurist painted my nails in a neutral color from Essie's collection. The color lasted more than a week. It was great. So, yes, I'll pay a few more dollars for the nail polish because I like it.

With furniture, some things can be bought cheap. For example, Ikea has some great desks, bookshelves, and storage units, however, some pieces are not worth their money. Especially when you have to put them together from directions with no written instructions. You can find luxury items for your home at stores like West Elm, Crate & Barrel, or even your local furniture store. They key is to find out if it works for you. Some things may be cheap, but well made. Those are the hidden jewels.

Ah luxury, can you afford not to pay for it?